Back To The Basics of Living A Life That Includes God - My Subconscious Awakens

Well before I learned of God and religion, I was influenced by the God of the Boy Scouts of America, and their reference to him in that program.

It was about 1965 when I started participating in Scouting, following my mom around while she did her Cub Scout activities. Maybe she was a volunteer for the neighborhood, or perhaps she was involved with my brother John.

While the Boy Scouts (or Cub Scouts) do not advocate a certain way to believe in God, they certainly support the faith of believers in such a general way, that it is for the most part not offensive to any, other than someone who may have strong feelings that no higher power exists at all. Examples can be found in the Scout Oath and Law.

The Scout Oath: On my honor I will do my best to do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law; to help other people at all times; to keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight.

The Scout Law: A Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent.

So here I am 53 years later, and these words of support from Scouting still have a strong influence on me.  So much so, as for this song below, Oh My Honor, to wake me up in the middle of the night as every single word and the melody came back to me, like I was sixteen again. I sang last night...

On My Honor
by Harry Bartelt

On my honor, I'll do my best, to do my duty to God.
On my honor, I'll do my best, to serve my country as I may.
On my honor, I'll do my best, to do my good turn each day,
To keep my body strengthened and keep my mind awakened.
To follow paths of righteousness. 
On my honor, I'll do my best.

This song was also recorded by the well known folk singer Burl Ives, and can be found easily in music formats online. Try here.

We sang this song on most major Scout outings.  The last time I sang it with a large gathering of people, was when my sister Irene included it in my Dad's funeral. To this day, the words tell me to serve God by serving others and to live an honorable, healthy life. I'm grateful my parents influenced me in this direction.

I'm A Lucky Man

I was nursing my wounds the other day, feeling sorry for myself until I met Willie.  Willie and I have the same work schedule.  We leave the house at 4:45 in the morning, report at 5:30, work a twelve hour day until 6 PM, get home around 7 and in bed by 9.  Then we do it again the next day.  The difference is Willie does it on a bicycle and I drive a truck.

I first met Willie when I nearly hit him on his bike early one morning.  Then I would continue to see him every morning and every afternoon.  Finally while looking for him I saw him, and stopped to introduced myself and we became friends.

God bless Willie and all the other folks working hard to make ends meet for their families.  My story reminded me of my favorite Montgomery Gentry song, with partial lyrics below, Lucky Man.  I am so blessed.  I hope my readers will realize all the blessings in their lives and reach out to others who may not be as fortunate.

"Lucky Man" is a song written by David Lee and Dave Turnbull, and recorded by American country music duo Montgomery Gentry that reached the top of the Billboard Hot Country Songs chart and stayed there for two weeks. It was released in January 2007 as the second single from their album Some People Change.

"Lucky Man"
See this home video on YouTube by Matt Alves

I have days where I hate my job
This little town and the whole world too
Last Sunday when the Bengals lost
Lord it put me in a bad mood

I have moments when I curse the rain
Then complain when the sun's too hot
I look around at what everyone has
And I forget about all I've got

But I know I'm a lucky man
God's given me a pretty fair hand
Got a house and a piece of land
A few dollars in a coffee can
My old trucks still running good
My ticker's ticking like they say it should
I got supper in the oven, a good woman's loving
And one more day to be my little kid's dad
Lord, knows I'm a lucky man

I Stand All Amazed

Yesterday I had opportunities to offer pastoral counseling to two inmates.  The Spirit was there, and I was able to do it without going outside my scope of work.  These moments pop up frequently.

I realize - know (as in a recent ah-ha moment for me) that I am a pastor of the Lord (with a little p) and the prison I work in is part of my parish.  So grateful.

This song below, I Stand All Amazed...

I sang it as a kid in the LDS church and it meant a lot to me back then.  When I recently researched it, I found the author was a Presbyterian man who later converted to Methodism.  By the end of his life Charles Gabriel wrote thousands of hymns and published numerous hymnals for mostly protestant denominations. Hope you enjoy it.  If you want to hear it live click here for The Lower Lights version on YouTube - one of my favorite bands.

I Stand All Amazed

I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me,
Confused at the grace that so fully he proffers me.
I tremble to know that for me he was crucified,
That for me, a sinner, he suffered, he bled and died.

(Chorus)

Oh, it is wonderful that he should care for me
Enough to die for me!
Oh, it is wonderful, wonderful to me!

I marvel that he would descend from his throne divine
To rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine,
That he should extend his great love unto such as I,
Sufficient to own, to redeem, and to justify.

I think of his hands pierced and bleeding to pay the debt!
Such mercy, such love and devotion can I forget?
No, no, I will praise and adore at the mercy seat,
Until at the glorified throne I kneel at his feet.

Text and music: Charles H. Gabriel, 1856-1932
Aka. Charlotte G. Homer, H. A. Henry, and S. B. Jackson
Song (1898/1905)

Florida Department of Corrections: Inspiring success by transforming one life at a time. - and yes, I do buy into this.  I experience it daily.

But, For The Grace of God Go I

The poem I created this morning while waking up...  "But by the grace of God go we.  May light to others may we be. - gus

About twelve years ago (2004) Sandy and I saw Flogging Molly at the Warped Tour and again at the House of Blues in Orlando, and little did I know how their music would have such an impact on me.

Over the last week I've had this song in my head running over and over, all day - all night.  In a way it drives me nuts, but in another way I find it so comforting.  Please read to the end, after the song for its full significance for me.

Grace of God Go I
By Flogging Molly, Swagger, 2000

Lookin down through a tide of no return
Is a field where the crops no longer grow
Parched is the land, strangled an be damned
There for the grace of God go I

Down beside where the riverbed sleeps
Is a man not knowin what he should feel
Mocked by the wave that beats the waters edge
There for the grace of God
There for the grace of God
There for the grace of God go I

If I ever hurt another like Thee again
I would drown myself beneath Your name
Lost was the child, we all once did hide
There for the grace of God
There for the grace of God
There for the grace of God go I

Songwriters: Bridget Regan, David King, Dennis Casey, Robert Anthony Schmidt, Matthew Hensley, Nathen Jeglinski, George Edward Schwindt
Published by: 26f Gellert Hill Music; Twentysixf Music

The original line and (near) title is attributed to John Bradford (1510-1555), an English Protestant theologian and reformer who was burned at the stake for speaking against the Church of England. In the phrase “But for the grace of God Go I.” he is referring to prisoners being executed for the same evil deeds he had committed himself, but not punished for.

Today I shared the lyrics with one of my prison inmate students who has a severe anger management problem, which has at times landed him in solitary confinement.  In my class alone, he's come close to being escorted out in hand-cuffs for his tendency to go to fight at a minor offense of one of his peers.

After an hour or so of pondering the words to this song he came and shared with me some of his childhood issues and how he needs to work on areas of depression, anxiety and anger management. He's going to write a paper on the song for me (G.E.D. preparation) and how the imagery aligns with his life experience.

Not A Saint

If Christians are considered “saints”, then why don’t I feel it?
A Saint I ain’t?
Just a sinner, a man, nothing more.
Trying to hold on to the belief that Christ bore all for me.

Unworthy.

When confusion's my companion
And despair holds me for ransom
When I'm caught deep in the valley
With chaos for my company

I will feel no fear
I know that You are near
I'll find my comfort here
‘Cause I know that You are near

My help comes from You
You're right here, pulling me through
You carry my weakness, my sickness, my brokenness all on Your shoulders
Your shoulders. (Shoulders, by King & Country)

Bless those who've caught the vision,
Realized the blessing, found their mission.
As for me, still searching.
Some days better than others. But I’ll continue.
Finding, lending strength with my brothers.

24 hrs later - I realize this story is kind of dark.  Forgive me please, I am what I am; but I also know we're all SO blessed.  We deal with our past, but there is a bright side.  Know there is.  Hang in there if you've felt similar.  Find a good friend to talk to. Say a little prayer.

- gus

Photo Credit: Saint Andrew the Apostle by Yoan from Gabrovo, 19th century.

A Song That Knocked My Socks Off, Way Back When

As some of my readers know, I teach at a state prison. I was talking to one of my best Inmate Teaching Assistants today who is an excellent and published writer. He's been incarcerated for 30 plus years with a life sentence to go, so he's not real tech savvy. Our inmates have zero access to email or internet.

Today he asked me what a blog is, and why people write them. To make a long story short, I told him people write blogs with different themes, thoughts, purposes and passions; but I write mine so someday my children and their children (and beyond) will know what their Papa Gus was like. I have my own Papa Gus, whom I know nothing about. He passed away shortly before I was born.

This song popped up for me this week from out of nowhere, and I just had to mention it. The first time I heard it, it knocked my socks off - significant for me, therefore I write about it. My son Chris introduced this to me back in (like) 2003 and it rocked my spiritual world. It still does with the memory of me being far from God back then, and this brought me to my knees in surrender. If you know it, you'll agree.  If its new to you, I think you'll like it.  The lyrics are still profound to me, so I included them below, and of course linked associated sources.  The genre is Christian Ska.

Here it is...

World Without End (YouTube) A Must See!
by Five Iron Frenzy
Album (wiki-link): The End Is Near, 2003.

For all the deepest thought compiled, philosophy
to laws of physics,
no one's ever heard or seen,
a more beautiful thing,
than this love that saved us.

[Chorus:]
In the soundless awe and wonder,
words fall short to hope again.
How beautiful,
how vast your love is,
new forever,
world without an end.

The very spark that burns the stars,
drew near to me today,
the God of everything that is,
whispered in my ear that His love is boundless.

This last verse of the song reminds me of what I experienced in, Return To Escalante, Moments of Solitude. "The very spark that burns the stars, drew near to me today, the God of everything that is, whispered in my ear that His love is boundless." Boundless as the stars in the heavens.

If you like this, I'm glad.  Please share it with your friends and join me on Twitter @guskoerner

On My Honor

When I was 11 years old the only thing I knew of or cared about God was the word itself.  I knew He was important, “God” was a big deal, but had no inkling of more.  I was 11!  In Boy Scouts we sang a song that would later have a profound effect on my life.  I can still sing it to this day – verbatim.

Back Row: Karl and Gus Koerner
Front Row: Charles Buck and David Sturdivant
about 1975

My life priorities in 1970 were 1) being acceptably popular, staying unnoticed at age 11 is a good thing.  2) girls – especially Lisa  from a distance, 3) football, and 4) Boy Scouts.  I loved Scouts.  We did cool things, and I had a Dad that participated with me (a little too much in my opinion).  To his credit I think he tried to keep a distance and tried to let me have a parent-less experience.  We camped, went on canoe trips, hiked in the woods, caught snakes, started fires and shot guns.  What more could a kid want?

In Scouting at the time, they weren't ashamed to say the word God.  After all, it’s still part of our nation isn't it? - In God We Trust and all.  It was the 1970’s and things were different then.  Mentioning God was acceptable in public.

At the weekend campfires which I either participated in or lead we always sang this song at closing, which I would now call a hymn.  It’s called On my Honor, and here it is…

On My Honor
by Harry Bartelt 
On my honor, I'll do my best, to do my duty to God.
On my honor, I'll do my best, to serve my country as I may.
On my honor, I'll do my best, to do my good turn each day,
To keep my body strengthened and keep my mind awakened.
To follow paths of righteousness.
On my honor, I'll do my best.

When I now think of the song I can see plainly it contains the principles of Commitment, Discipleship, Patriotism, Service to Humanity, Personal Physical and Mental Health responsibility.  I’m sure a person could also attach other attributes, but I won’t here.  These are enough.  To this day, even though I may not live this song to its fullest, I certainly know and own the values of the song and do my best to uphold them.  I hope it is continuing in the Boy Scout program.

Train children in the right way, and when old, they will not stray. Proverbs 22:6

The photo above is when we went as a troop to Charles L. Sommers Wilderness Canoe Base for three weeks.  I'm not quite 11 years old there, but we were still singing the Scout Hymn, "On My Honor".  I'd like to give a special tribute to David Sturdivant who was my best friend and passed away a few years ago.

I hope you'll share this with a friend.

-gus

Favorite Prison Songs

This started with a tweet, and the list is growing. The title of this story is kinda off, because these aren't really my favorite songs, it's more like prison songs are in my top favorite genre's.  So what's yours? Comment here or tweet me @guskoerner #prisonsongs

Here's the list...

Blake Shelton - Ol' Red
Merle Haggard - Mama Tried
Johnny Cash - Folsom Prison Blues
Johnny Cash - San Quentin
Jimmy Page - Prison Blues
David Allan Coe- If That Ain't Country

Beautiful Soul

I wrote this, not to one of my children, but in response to what one of my kids is going through.  After seeing the movie Les Miserables, the 2012 version, the character Fantine (Anne Hathaway) sings the song, I Dreamed A Dream, which is I think, the saddest song I've ever heard in my life.  No kidding.  After reading the lyrics privately, I realized that even though I've had struggles, its nothing to compare with what challenges some people face.

I've had some dark days in my life but, by the grace of God made it through them.  Each day gets better, but we have to try, if not for ourselves for our loved ones.  We are so blessed if we only realize it. Here it is.

Beautiful Soul

There’s a light within my eyes, a day of hope a day of giving.
The feeling of despair is gone, and suddenly feel life’s worth living.
Let us praise the God on high. Let us thank Him for the beauty.
Of our soul that needs Him most, to share the grace that's our duty.

So if you’re lost and torn with fear, know there’s one who holds you dear.
Just close your eyes and ask for help, and He will hear your prayer sincere.
Let us praise the God on high. Let us thank Him for our beauty.
Our souls are crafted after His, He shares His grace by love not by duty.

For my children, nieces and nephews, and anyone who seeks healing.
Inspired by the song from Les Miserables, “I Dreamed A Dream.

By G. Koerner, July 26, 2014, 10:35 PM

Music That Moves Me

Sometimes we hear words so profound we remember them for a lifetime, and occasionally we can recall the exact time, circumstance and location of when we heard a particular quote.  Indeed, sometimes those words can have a profound affect upon our life.  Like Kennedy's challenge to go to the moon and beyond when he said, "...We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard..." (9/12/62).  This speech didn't move me so much, as it moved our nation to step-up together to build our space program.  That is the most inspiring result of that quote to me.  It's been a long time since our nation has been moved in a positive, peaceful direction in that way.

About seven years ago at 4-H Camp I asked a ten year old little country boy about a particular song, I think we were talking about rap music, Britney Spears or some pop music topic, and he said, "The music moves me, but it moves me ugly."  I laughed and laughed.  I'll remember that for a lifetime, especially the way he said it, in a shy, kicking the dirt reaction.

Music has always been a huge part of my life, and I've never been bound by a particular genre.  Like Kennedy's or Martin Luther King Jr.'s speeches or so many other great people, art and literature in any form can touch our soul and raise us to greater heights or soothe our broken hearts.  Music is art and literature in a combined form, and it can give us hope and motivate us to go on when we may otherwise not be able to.  Music can be something we can relate to, knowing that the artist is speaking of an experience we're living out or have been through.

Below is my current, but not complete list of songs that move me or have played a significant part of my life.  Even though the first iteration of this list is May 2014, I'll be updating it over time.  After the top five, the rest of the listed alphabetically by song name.  I'd love to hear some of your comments about my particular choices!

1) Night Riders Lament, Jerry Jeff Walker
2) Wild Montana Sky, John Denver, Emmylou Harris
3) Voice of Truth, Casting Crowns
4) Testify To Love, Avalon
5) It Is Well With My Soul, Horatio G. Spafford
6) Mary's Boy Child, Boney M

Battle Hymn of the Republic, esp. verse 5, Mormon Tabernacle Choir and others
Blackland Farmer, Frankie Miller sung by Elizabeth Cook
Broken Beautiful, Ellie Holcomb
Cajun Moon, Ricky Scaggs
Cherokee Maiden, Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys
Christ Has Risen, Matt Maher
Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue, Toby Keith
Doxology/Praise God from Whom All Blessings Flow, Ken Thomas 1674
Guacamole, Texas Tornados
Here I Am, Downhere
Hey Baby (Que Paso?), Texas Tornados
High Hopes, Frank Sinatra, 1959
I Dreamed A Dream, Anne Hathaway ver., Les Misérables 2012
If I Could Only Win Your Love, Emmylou Harris
I'll Do It All Over Again, Crystal Gayle, 2008
In My Daughter's Eyes, Martina McBride, 2003
In The Garden, C. Austin Miles  / Alan Jackson
It's a Great Day To Be Alive, Travis Tritt
King of the Road, Roger Miller
K-K-K Katey, Billy Murray
Knee Deep, Zac Brown Band
Lead Me, Sanctus Real
Little People, Les Miserables Original Cast
London Homesick Blues, Gary P. Nunn w/Jerry Jeff Walker
Meet Me In Montana, Marie Osmond and Dan Seals, 1985.
Morning Has Broken, Cat Stevens
My Favorite Things, Sound of Music, Original Soundtrack
Old Hippie, The Bellamy Brothers
On My Honor (Boy Scout hymn) by Harry Bartelt
Overcome, Jeremy Camp
San Antonio Rose, Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys
Some People Change, Montgomery Gentry
Stuck Like Glue, Sugarland
Telephone, Lady Gaga (PG-13 video)
That's Right You're Not From Texas, Lyle Lovett
The Auctioneer, Leroy Van Dyke
The Battle of New Orleans, Johnny Horton
The Likes of You Again, Flogging Molly
When I Get Where I'm Going, Brad Paisley and Dolly Parton
Where Were You When The World Stopped Turning, Alan Jackson
You Are My Sunshine, Jimmie Davis and Charles Mitchell, 1939
You Never Even Called Me By My Name, David Allen Coe

47 songs above, last edited October 18, 2014.

I Used To Hate Christian Music

There was a time in my life that Christian music turned me off.  If it came on the radio, it would immediately get changed, to more than likely country or NPR.  Then one day, one of my best friends Gayle, a University of Florida County Extension Agent was going on and on about this group Avalon, and how they were playing in Orlando.  As I recall, it was about October 2005, and I think she even got out of a work detail to go see them.  Because of that interaction with Gayle, it made an impression causing me to to think, "hey, if she thinks they're this good, I'll give it a listen."

When I finally heard the song Testify to Love, it made such a deep impression that I'll never forget.  The song means to me, the very crutch of what it means to be a Christian.  For Mr. Gus, being a minister of the Lord, a Christian, an evangelist, a pastor or chaplain or a good neighbor (in the biblical sense) means simply that I testify to love, showing Christ's example in everything I do.  It's not about living within the confines and structure or a particular religion, but following the example of the world's ultimate example of love. Since that time I have grown to love Christian music for what it represents, namely nurturing a relationship with God, showing gratitude for all things including challenges and taking care of what matters most which is our relationships with others, especially family.

Thank you Gayle for your witness to Christ by publicly sharing your passion for music with your colleagues at work.  I'm forever grateful that you testified to love.  Below are the lyrics, credits and how you can buy the song.

Testify to Love

by Avalon

All the colors of the rainbow
All the voices of the wind
Every dream that reaches out
That reaches out to find where love begins
Every word of every story
Every star in every sky
Every corner of creation
Lives to testify

Chorus
For as long as I shall live
I will testify to love
I'll be a witness in the silences
When words are not enough
With every breath I take
I will give thanks to God above
For as long as I shall live
I will testify to love

From the mountains to the valleys
From the rivers to the sea
Every hand that reaches out
Every hand that reaches out to offer peace
Every simple act of mercy
Every step to kingdom come
All the hope in every heart will
Speak what love has done

Chorus 3 times

Writer(s): Henk Pool, Ralph van Manen, Robert T. Riekerk
Copyright: Universal/Mca Music Holland B.V.

Album: A Maze Of Grace, available on iTunes, Play Store or your favorite music vendor.  Google the song, and it will pop up on YouTube to hear it for free.  Like this link.

The Daydawn is Breaking, a favorite hymn.

This isn't the first song I've shared on one of my blogs. Anyone who knows me, knows I love music, and knows I don't care who hears me when I sing.  The songs I love vary from hymns, to country and I have a partiality for old Baptist bluegrass.  Sometimes there are verses on religious music that I don't agree with, but that doesn't make the song any less worthy in my ears (or heart).  I even love a good patriotic song by Toby Keith or an occasional pop song.

The other morning I was driving post around the prison, making sure all was secure and the sun was rising, oh about thirty minutes before it actually came up.  Out of the blue, I just started singing the first line, "The day dawn is breaking, the world is awaking...".  The words popped into my head like I sang it yesterday, but in fact, I think its been over a decade.

The Day Dawn Is Breaking, no. 52
1. The day dawn is breaking, the world is awaking, The clouds of night's darkness are fleeing away. The worldwide commotion, from ocean to ocean, Now heralds the time of the beautiful day.

[Chorus] Beautiful day of peace and rest, Bright be thy dawn from east to west. Hail to thine earliest welcome ray, Beautiful, bright, millennial day.

3. Still let us be doing, our lessons reviewing, Which God has revealed for our walk in his way; And then, wondrous story, the Lord in his glory Will come in his pow'r in the beautiful day.

4. Then pure and supernal, our friendship eternal, With Jesus we'll live, and his counsels obey Until ev'ry nation will join in salvation And worship the Lord of the beautiful day.

Text: Joseph L. Townsend, 1849-1942
Music: William Clayson, 1840-1887

Property of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, Rights and Use Information (Updated 2/21/2012) Privacy Policy (Updated 2/1/2012) © 2014 by Intellectual Reserve, Inc. All rights reserved.  Photo by Quiet Wallpapers.

In All Things Give Praise, Doxology

When I was a sixteen year old young man standing in a non-Mormon church for the first time (which happened to be Presbyterian), I marveled at the beauty and simplicity of this song commonly known as The Doxology or The Common Doxology, written in 1674 by Thomas Ken. A doxology in general terms is a short hymn of praise to God used in various Christian worship services.  It goes...

Praise God, from whom all blessings flow;
Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heav'nly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.
Amen.

Most protestant churches sing this song, but we never did in the LDS church growing up, and they still don't to my knowledge.  This little hymn has all the things I like.  It talks about the flow of blessings in our life, which I've always, always felt.  It refers to us as creatures and could also imply that the creatures of the forest and streams also give praise, and lastly gives the praise specifically to the God the Father, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost.  No matter how one pictures, interpretes or imagines the triune Godhead to be, this line of the song is general enough to encompass most religions.

One final note on this is that Thomas Ken was the brother-in-law to Izaak Walton, author of The Compleat Angler, published in 1653 which is a celebration of the art and spirit of fishing in prose and verse. Can't wait to find this book!

Who (or what) is your giant?

You must read the Bible story in 1st Samuel 17: 1-51, which is the story of how young David, being of small stature kills the giant Goliath with just a sling and a stone.

My giant that I'm dealing with today is discouragement, and as the giant in the story, it is mocking me.  It is saying I'm not good enough, worthy enough and smart enough to get that better job and mend the relationship issues in my family.

At the same time, the Voice of Truth is telling me a different story (just like the song).  It is telling me to lay my burdens at the foot of the cross and give all my problems, one at a time to Jesus.  In doing so I am giving fear to God as well, knowing that He is looking out for me and my family.  He will heal relationships, broken hearts and bad habits if we do our best, give our problems to Him and trust.  So that's what I'm going to do.

Who or what is your giant? We would love to hear your story.
by Andrew

When you're at your worst, count your blessings.

I really feel compelled to tell you my story, or at least some of the highlights.  For now, I'll just share a snippet.  It seems like this past decade has had some of the worst and some of the best times in my life.  In 2000, and then again in 2001 I lost my Dad, then my Mom.  Then by 2002 I had a near job lay-off, and a divorce.  A psychologist told me that each incident was enough to bring any person to the brink of depression, drink or just plain giving up, so I was trying to deal with these setbacks, trying to keep my sanity.

I had a buddy that got me involved a bit with the Catholic church, just long enough to learn some of their ways by reading a couple of books and attending a mass or two.  During the process, I somehow ended up with some Rosary beads.  Of course, I didn't know any of the formal Catholic prayers, but I loved holding the cross.  It made me feel peaceful.  My original Rosary was made of wood, I've since purchased several more.

One night alone in bed, lonely as could be, contemplating all of the crap I was going through and about in tears with despair, I clutched the Rosary beads.  I had heard that when you’re feeling down to count your blessings, so I started doing that, naming one blessing per bead as they slipped through my fingers.  I know I went around the loop for sure one time, perhaps two, naming blessings one-by-one.  I first listed my children, then my siblings, then my dog, job and friends.  Before I knew it, I felt better.  The neat thing about using the beads to count each blessing was that when I was done, I could look at something tangible and visually identify a whole bunch of things I should be thankful for.  I still use the beads to this day in the same way.  I also love this old hymn sung in many churches called “Count our blessings”.  Here's the first verse.

When upon life’s billows you are tempest-tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.
Refrain:
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

The reason this ministry got started

This song was the motivation to this ministry.  I've been trying my best to walk with the Lord since December, 2011.  I never want to go back to what I used to be.

Voice Of Truth

By Casting Crowns

Oh what I would do to have

The kind of faith it takes to climb out of this boat I'm in

Onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone

To the realm of the unknown where Jesus is

And He's holding out his hand

But the waves are calling out my name and they laugh at me

Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed

The waves they keep on telling me

Time and time again. 'Boy, you'll never win!'

"You'll never win"

But the voice of truth tells me a different story

And the voice of truth says "Do not be afraid!"

And the voice of truth says "This is for My glory"

Out of all the voices calling out to me

I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

Oh what I would do to have

The kind of strength it takes to stand before a giant

With just a Sling and a stone

Surrounded by the sound of a thousand warriors

Shaking in their armor

Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out my name and he laughs at me

Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed

The giant keeps on telling me

Time and time again "boy, you'll never win!

"You'll never win"

But the stone was just the right size

To put the giant on the ground

And the waves they don't seem so high

From on top of them looking down

I will soar with the wings of eagles

When I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus

Singing over me

I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth.